364. One year on. A summation of parts.

Good morning? I am in Australia and it’s early AS so it’s probs midday for my friends who read this in NZ. The time difference has got my body clock all fucked up and we go home tomorrow so it’ll start all over again!

Well. Well well well. It has been a whole year since I jumped on my lappytoppy and declared for all the world to see (all 5o of you lol) that I was going to change things and be denied everything delicious and appreciate everything wonderful and generally do what I could to heal my gut and get some good stuff going.

Oh what an optimist I am! Lol at me for all the world to see.

Things I have learned this year;

  1. Lists are a good way to fill a blog post.
  2. Sugar is really fucking addictive. I quit ciggies way easier. Of course you can’t get pregnant to quit sugar but if that was a cure I might consider it. (And, actually, sneaking off to have a moro bar when I have too many wines is probably better for me tbh).
  3. Raw veges still give me a sore tummy – there’s no easing them back in to my diet slowly or gently. They stay OUT.
  4. The more people (that’s you guys) that read your blog = the more pressure you feel to be funny and upbeat = less posts on grumpy/shitty days.
  5. No alcohol was easy after the first 7 days. Way easier for me as a person who has already had two kids and has no social life – probs harder for you popular young things with lives and social obligations.
  6. I do regret having had that drink on my birthday and ‘breaking the seal’ primarily because I wanted to see the looks on peeps faces when they heard about my amazing will power and fortitude. Not because of any obvious gut issues.
  7. Number 6 is a lie – Alcohol gives me a big round belly and my anxiety levels definitely rise. I just like wine so I lie to myself damnit.
  8. Work and the stress associated with it contributes SO much to whether I am taking care of myself. When things are hard at work everything else falls apart and this year has been a hard one for lots of reasons at work.
  9. I have learned that it’s never ok to comment on a persons body; it’s none of my business what a person looks like or why they look like they do. It’s not my journey and not my business. This rule does not extend to asking where they got their gorgeous shoes/dress/bag – a grrls gotta keep up with the play.
  10. Yoga is not for me. I am no good at the slow, spiritual, breathing crap. I like to run and jump and be fast and nearly die and feel like I have REALLY had a good workout. Dr Libby be damned.

I haven’t written since November because life got busy busy busy and I was just hanging on and riding it out.  This post is not a final post, but I needed to acknowledge that all my big talk at the start of the year was for nowt and that I have pretty much gone full circle. Perhaps inevitably.

From my first ever post ‘The fact that my skin is the most sensitive it has been, my belly looks 6 month preggers half the time and random and unrelated food can give me terrible stomach pain‘ is totes sames. And I will admit that it got better there for a wee while when I was in the throes of strictness and had the energy to keep it all together. I will admit that. But I was no fun to hang out with either – no easy lunch dates – the restrictions consumed me (ironically) and became so big and unmanageable. Sucked balls.

So. Here I am in North Lakes, Queensland at my Sis-in-laws place, feeling more whale like than ever, but also way more ok with it than ever, more tanned than I’ve been in ages (honestly a tan makes it ALL ok) and having had way more ‘quality’ time with my children than anyone deserves.

My youngest child has spent the first 8 days of our holiday being terribly home-sick, sobbing great big wet tears for our dog and house and generally being a cling-on at all times; up until yesterday where he declared that he would like to live here now thanks and become outraged at the thought of us boarding the plane tomorrow. The eight year old has morphed overnight into a 14 year old, complete with nonsensical grunting and eye rolling whenever I speak, an uncanny ability to know when the coke (forbidden for kids normally) is being taken out of the fridge and a drooling, zombie-like addiction to the xbox (one of the reasons we don’t have one at home). Also he pulls the fingers whenever I get the camera out thanks to one Uncle (who may not ever be forgiven by my father who was outraged at the photo below – he clearly doesn’t know my child very well to be shocked by that).

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The grumpy Dutchman is content in the bosom of his family – toying with the idea of giving up smoking when we land on home ground (yay for that idea!) and hanging out for alone time because we are all sleeping in the same bed at the moment. It’s been wonderful to see all of the cousins hanging out together, the littlest being doted on by her older rellies and the nearly a teenage girl attitude that is coming off my 11 year old niece in waves – I love teenagers, have I mentioned that? I’m not even being sarcastic – it’s a sickness I have.

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We fly home to our fur-children tomorrow for a brand new year, and I’ve got two weeks before I am going to allow myself to think about work (the source of all the stress in my life at the moment lol). Two weeks more of ‘quality time’ with my kids before they head off for the holiday program and two weeks to finish all those books I have started reading.

I will be writing next year, I enjoy this bloggy thing – and I am very appreciative of all of you who have read it this year and ‘liked’ my posts or written lovely comments or generally just agreed with my ranting and raving.

Have a safe and Happy New Year’s eve – I will be asleep before midnight you can count on it! See you on the other side.

Peace.

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.These images are from our wanderings around Brisbane city.
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